Chapter Text
Blooper 1
Everyone is at the wedding reception of Johnny and Mavis. Dracula pulls out his ukulele to sing for them
Dracula (singing): And you’ll always be my moonlight, but now on wings of love you soar, now that you’re Johnny’s g -
Suddenly, one of the strings breaks midsong
Drac: You’ve got to be kidding me!
Director: Cut!
Dracula groans.
Drac: I told you we should have gotten a brand new one!
Frank: But Drac, it is new! I think maybe it’s your fingernails. You ever thought of cutting them down?
Drac: It’s never been a problem before!
Murray (whispering to the camera): He’s in denial!
Blooper 2
Dennis is held up by the monster doctor and Drac, dressed as a nurse, grabs the baby
Drac (in a female voice): Oh! It’s a boy! It’s a boy! The Dracula bloodline carries on!
Suddenly, his bouncing around causes the blonde wig to come off of his head and for the watermelons in his chest fall out and splat on the ground.
Drac (still in female voice): Uh OH! Ehh… clean up on aisle 1!
Director: Cut!
Blooper 3
Dennis, Drac, and the Drac Pack are inside the hearse. Clapstick comes down on clapboard.
Director: Action!
Drac: You see, Denisovich, monsters are nice, just like you! But when the moon comes out, the real monster fun begins: being scary! Right guys?
Drac’s friends are busy listening to “Worth It” by Fifth Harmony. Drac shuts off the music.
Drac: Guys! What is wrong with you?
Frank: Come on, everybody likes that song.
Drac: We’re not ‘everybody.’ We’re scary monsters, remember?
Dracula puts in a new CD
Griffin: Hey, what are you putting in?
Dracula: It’s an audiobook! “Bigfoot’s Life Story” he reads it himself.
Dracula presses play, but instead of the book it plays Fifth Harmony’s other song “I’m In Love With a Monster” The pack starts to dance to that song instead as Dracula groans.
Murray: Woah! Bigfoot’s got some groove! A real taste for music, for sure!
Drac: What?! NO! That’s not the right one! UGHHH…
Director: Cut!
Blooper 4
The Drac Pack is in the woods with Dennis.
Wayne: Listen, I’m not gonna set monsters back again just to make your grandkid like vampires. Anyway, there’s nothing to kill here. It’s all been -
Suddenly, they hear a noise and out of the shrubs comes Elliot from Open Season along with Boog.
Elliot: Huh? Oh, no, no Boog, I told you there were hunters on this side of the forest!
Boog: Relax, El, I’ll handle this. (clears his throat and speaks to directors). Our mistake folks, nothing to see here, we’ll just be on our way
The pair exit through the shrubs and the director calls for a cut
Blooper 5
Dennis, Dracula, and the Drac Pack are on top of the rickety tower in Camp Winnepecaca.
Dennis: I wanna fly now!
Dracula: Atta-bat! You know Papa’s right here if you need him.
Griffin: Ugh, I can’t watch this
Murray: Please don’t
Dracula: Here… we…. Go!
Dracula throws Dennis off of the tower. The monsters all lean over the edge to watch him go down. Suddenly, a large cracking sound in the wood is heard. The monsters eyes all widen as they realize what is about to happen, and then they all fall down screaming as the tower breaks beneath them.
Frank (fading): I knew coming up here was not a very good ideaaaaa!
Director: Cut!
Blooper 6
Dracula, the pack, Dennis, Mavis, and Johnny are all outside the front of the hotel.
Dennis: Mommy, I flew!
Mavis (angrily): I saw
She pulls out the phone and starts to play the Dracula Remix from YouTube. Blobby begins to dance, and Murray begins to bop his head too.
Murray: It really does have a catchy beat, Blobster!
The mummy begins to dance, influencing the other monsters to dance too. Drac crosses his arms
Drac: Are you kidding me right now?!
Director: Cut!
Blooper 7
Monsters are at Dennis’s party. Kakie is being introduced to Drac. Clapstick comes down on clapboard.
Director: Action!
Brandon: Hey man
Drac: Nauseated to meet you
Brandon: So when does this happen? I got a book fair in half an hour
Suddenly the doors open up widely from the other end of the room and Vlad appears. The camera zooms in, but zooms in too fast so it hits him in the head.
Vlad: Ow!
Cameraman: Sorry Mr. Vlad sir!
Vlad: Yeah, you should be, Shlumpy! One more mistake outta you and you’ll be dinner tonight!
Director: He doesn’t really mean that
Vlad (turning to speak to the camera): And I do mean it too!