Chapter Text
Starscream remained completely silent over the next few cycles. Ka obeyed every command he gave, a silent shadow of kaz. Every time Thundercracker left the room without kan, ka hesitated, reaching for him, but never spoke even then. A visit to Ratchet revealed very little.
"There's nothing physically wrong with her vocalizer," Ratchet said. "By all means, she should be able to speak."
Starscream didn't even protest the use of small to reference kan. Thundercracker's spark sank. Aside from the wounds ka sustained and starvation-induced weight loss, Ratchet could find nothing abnormal.
"Make sure she fuels," Ratchet said, handing him a pack of specially enriched cubes—the kind reserved for situations exactly like this.
Starscream accepted the fuel without complaint. Ka always drank it slowly, pausing frequently to stare into it with a blank expression. When they ate in the mess hall, Starscream was dead to the world, completely ignoring the others at the table.
Thundercracker didn't know what to do. So, when he caught Starscream sitting in the corner of the room, a datapad on kas lap opened to a diagram of a cybercat's internals, he sat next to kan and pulled kan close. Starscream still refused to sit in the nest—where Skywarp was currently lounging beside Soundwave, sending kan the occasional wary glance.
"What're you reading?" Thundercracker asked.
Starscream turned the datapad toward him slightly. It was in Common. All of the datapads were. Vosian had no formal writing system. Starscream couldn't read at all, so there was no telling what ka was actually looking at the datapad for. It was possible to create and update language packets manually, but it was a difficult and long process prone to frequent errors. Was Starscream trying to use the datapad to update kas?
Thundercracker reached over and rubbed Starscream's helm. Ka leaned into the touch, nuzzling him. Then, ka leaned further and further into him, purring in that desperate way he only heard once before.
Physical ailments or not, Starscream was hurting. Thundercracker could recognize that. He just didn't know how to fix it.
Thundercracker ran the data through his processor again. Ka called kaz worthless. Ka asked what kan was if ka wasn't Winglord. Kas wanted to have power over everyone. That was it. Starscream felt powerless. That was why ka attacked Skywarp, and why ka attempted to attack him. Thundercracker would have to show Starscream that ka was powerful and worth something.
An alarm went off as Thundercracker's chronometer incremented. Scrap. He nearly forgot. It would have to wait. Gently, he detached himself from Starscream as he rose. Ka stared up at him, wings lowering.
Thundercracker could bring Starscream with him. But then he would also have to bring Skywarp, and then Soundwave couldn't stay in the room alone. None of them knew about what Prowl and Optimus were going to do. It was best they didn't. So, as he entered the hall, he left Starscream and the others behind.
Prowl and Optimus were already waiting. Arcee and Ratchet flanked them—the only two others aware of what was to come. Thundercracker hugged Prowl. It was returned without hesitation.
"Good luck," Thundercracker whispered.
"We'll give updates for as long as we can," Prowl said.
'As long as they could' wouldn't amount to much. The journey would take orns without a transport—which had been refused for reasons that were never explained to them—and Iacon's signal blockers would render outside communication impossible once they reached its limits. But it was more than nothing.
"I know," Thundercracker said.
He had only been reunited with his creator for such a short time, and already they were torn apart again. But it was for a good cause. Thundercracker would just have to hope they succeeded.
Thundercracker held on for as long as he could, knowing it may be the last time he touched Prowl for a long time. But eventually, it had to end. They said their goodbyes, and Prowl and Optimus were gone.
Thundercracker went back to his room with a heavy spark.
The hall wasn't quiet. He couldn't tell what it was, but as he approached the door, he knew it wasn't normal. He entered the code and it opened. The sound became clearer—high-pitched, repeated whines. The air was soaked in fear. Soundwave pressed naz into the farthest corner of the room, datapad pulled close to nas chest.
It was too familiar. Fury rose in Thundercracker's spark. How could kan? He bared his dentae and flexed his claws. But as he turned, the sight froze his fuel lines.
It wasn't magenta atop purple, but purple atop magenta. Skywarp pinned Starscream to the wall, a snarl on waz face.
"What were you thinking?" Wa hissed. "What were you thinking?"
Starscream struggled in waz grip, whining like a distressed seekerling. Skywarp growled.
Thundercracker had seen enough. He launched himself at Skywarp, knocking wan sideways. Wa gasped, staring up at him.
Starscream's odd clinginess, kas constant submission when Skywarp showed any amount of displeasure, even that moment vorns ago when Starscream had buried kaz into him and purred desperately just as ka had that morning—it all made sense.
'I can take it.'
Starscream never would have said anything. Thundercracker may have never known. Cold horror crept over his fuel lines. How long had this really been happening?
"What are you thinking?" Thundercracker spat. "We're trine. I told you I didn't want you fighting! And now I find out you've been fighting behind my back this whole time!"
Though, had it really been behind his back? Skywarp made no secret of waz dislike for Starscream. Starscream was always ready to fire back. But apparently, only when Thundercracker was there.
Skywarp widened waz wings. "It's not fighting! It's discipline!"
"Discipline," Thundercracker said. He motioned to Starscream, who sank to the floor, gaze averted. "That's not discipline. It's just violence."
Skywarp shook waz helm.
"You don't understand," wa said. "Starscream is a bad Claw. Ka keeps putting us in danger and stepping out of line. You weren't going to enforce order, so someone had to. You've seen how ka was with Megatron. Ka doesn't know what authority means. Ka tried to kill you! And you didn't even punish kan!"
Skywarp thought this was normal. That this was 'enforcing order.' Bitterness coated Thundercracker's mouth. He felt sick.
"You saw what happened to Megatron, Skywarp."
They were both there. So why didn't Skywarp understand that was where this path led?
"Starscream never followed Megatron," Thundercracker said. "Ka was coerced into obeying. We all were. And the moment we realized that…"
"We killed kan," Skywarp said softly.
Thundercracker flicked his wing to stave off the anger inside of him. Wa got these ideas from somewhere, just like Megatron did. He knew Skywarp could be kind. He knew Skywarp could change if wa recognized the harm wa had done.
And, selfishly, he didn't want to lose wan.
"Why am I a good Winglord?" Thundercracker asked.
Skywarp's brow furrowed. "Because you listen to everyone. You… don't want us to be hurt."
Waz wings lowered. Waz optics dimmed as the realization came over wan. But Thundercracker continued to press.
"Do I use violence to be a good Winglord?" He asked. "Do I punish Seekers who challenge me, like Dreadwing?"
"No," Skywarp said. Wa took a step back, then another. "I…"
"Someone once told me that actions and instincts speak louder than words," Thundercracker said. "What are your actions saying right now?"
Wa hung waz helm and lowered waz to the floor, kneeling.
"I've been a bad trinemate! I—I shouldn't have overstepped! I shouldn't have…"
"Shouldn't have hurt Starscream?" Thundercracker said.
"Yes!" Skywarp said. "I—I'm sorry, Winglord!"
Waz wings began to shake, even more fear saturating the air. Thundercracker forced himself to calm. What was the most important thing right now? He glanced at Starscream. Ka was still on the ground, knees drawn to kaz chest.
"We can talk more when I come back," Thundercracker said to Skywarp, making his way toward Starscream.
Ka didn't even look up as he approached. The only thing that hinted at any awareness was a quick flick of Starscream's wing. Thundercracker took kan by the arm and pulled kan up. Ka didn't resist as Thundercracker led kan out.
The door slid shut. Gingerly, Thundercracker lowered both of them to the ground. The moment they reached it, Starscream launched kaz forward, burying kas face in his chest and purring desperately.
"Was Skywarp hurting you the whole time?" Thundercracker asked. Was that why ka had attacked wan?
Starscream didn't answer. Ka continued to purr. Thundercracker reached over and stroked kas wing. Ka closed kas optics.
"Please tell me I didn't miss something like this," Thundercracker mumbled, more to himself than Starscream. He knew the answer already. "I'm sorry."
Starscream kept purring. Thundercracker kept stroking. Aside from Starscream's purrs, the hall was silent.
A weak, hushed voice broke the silence.
"You were right."
Thundercracker straightened up. "About what?"
"The roles," Starscream said. "And everyone using them against me."
Thundercracker didn't have any words. So, he settled for wrapping his arms around Starscream. Ka went limp, kas wings drooping.
"If I'm not a freak Spark pretending to be a Claw, then I'm a violent, stupid Claw that can't do the one thing I'm supposed to do," Starscream said. "A bad Spark, a bad Claw. There's no winning. No matter what I do, acceptance is yanked out of my grasp."
Jetfire and Acid Storm kept their true roles a secret. Thundercracker had only shared his with them. They had the opportunity to hide, however much it hurt. It both erased and shielded them. But Starscream was already known. There was no forcing the flock to forget.
"Then don't try to be accepted," Thundercracker said, determination building in his spark. "Hotlink came from a flock where Claws were the ones who had seekerlings. Even as a Claw, there are other ways to be. You're just a different kind."
Starscream was silent and still. Thundercracker wasn't sure what to make of it.
"There's nothing wrong with you," Thundercracker said. "It's the flock. It's their narrow-mindedness. There are more Seekers in the flock like us, but they're too afraid to reveal themselves."
He half expected Starscream to ask who, but ka didn't.
"I wish I could believe that," ka said.
Thundercracker held kan close. The hall was quiet save for the quiet mechanisms that kept them both alive. But eventually, Starscream tried to squirm away. Thundercracker let kan.
Ka leaned against the wall.
"You should talk to Skywarp," ka said. "Wa is probably shaking in the corner right now."
Thundercracker moved to stand up, but caught himself.
"Are you sure you're alright?" He asked.
Starscream hadn't wanted to be without him until now. But until now, Thundercracker hadn't known what Skywarp was doing. A quick analysis of his memory files confirmed what he wished he noticed before: Starscream's hesitance was worse when ka was going to be left in a room with Skywarp.
"Go talk to Skywarp," ka said sharply.
Thundercracker didn't push it. He opened the door and slipped back into the room. Rather than hiding in the corner, Skywarp knelt exactly where he left wan, wings low and helm pressed to the floor.
"How long have you been like that?" Thundercracker asked.
Skywarp didn't look up. Thundercracker approached. Gently, he tapped wan on the shoulder.
"Get up," he said. "That can't be comfortable."
Wa looked up at him and slowly rose. Thundercracker guided wan into the nest. They both sat. Soundwave was still in the corner. Thundercracker caught nas optics and motioned for nam to join them. After a moment of hesitation, na did.
Thundercracker wrapped his arms around Soundwave. Na returned the embrace.
"I'm sorry you had to see that," Thundercracker whispered.
How many times had Soundwave seen it and not said anything? Nas sparklinghood before joining the flock wasn't a good one. Thundercracker had never asked for details. Maybe he should have, if it would've prevented this.
"If you ever see one of us hurt each other again, please tell someone," Thundercracker said. "It's not okay."
Soundwave nodded. Thundercracker nuzzled nam.
"Good," he said.
He released nam. Soundwave settled beside him. Now, for the hard part: keeping his temper while chewing out Skywarp. Wa wilted under his gaze.
"Do you remember what you said when I told you I thought I was a bad Seeker?" Thundercracker asked.
Skywarp stayed quiet, but nodded. It was vorns ago. Thundercracker was surprised wa remembered at all, but the statement always lived in his memory files.
"You said I wasn't bad, just different," Thundercracker said. "Starscream is different, too."
Skywarp's optics widened.
"Scrap," wa said, curling in on waz. "Scrap. I—I didn't…"
Wa didn't what?
"I should've put it together," wa said. "My—my dam said that to me. I knew it was my fault my sires left me, but my dam loved me. So—so she told me: I wasn't bad, just different. And every time I felt scared or—or lonely I would play that memory file. I thought Starscream was just like my sires, but I was the one being just like them."
Thundercracker's anger evaporated. It wasn't his place to forgive Skywarp. Wa hadn't hurt him. But he could understand how it happened. It didn't excuse it, only explained it.
"I don't know what to do," Skywarp said. "How do I fix this?"
Thundercracker didn't know either. But Starscream was out there, waiting for their talk to finish. Thundercracker rose and opened the door. As expected, ka was at the other side. After a brief glance at Thundercracker, ka entered. Thundercracker led ka toward the nest, but ka paused at its edge.
"I'm sorry," Skywarp said.
Starscream entered the nest and sat.
"Don't apologize," ka said. "It's over."
Starscream slept in the nest that night.
!!!
Thundercracker grew more reluctant to leave the room with each passing cycle. The bi-cycle visits to the flock made his plating crawl, every moment spent outside the room a new brand of torture. He knew why. That didn't do anything to help. It felt like it was too soon, but when he looked back on it, nearly a full vorn had passed since his last Hunger.
Prowl's messages fell from once every cycle to once a decacyle and were falling still. They would stop eventually. Thundercracker dreaded when they would. But he trusted his creator. If anyone could convince The Magnus to take action, it would be Prowl. He wished he could've come along, but the moment a Seeker was spotted in Iacon would be his last.
As more Seekers grew comfortable entering the base, more conflicts arose—Autobots attempting to touch wings, or stepping too close to a trine's Spark, or looking them in the eye and accidentally inciting a challenge, or any other number of things. A seminar on treating Seekers with respect did little to curb it. It seemed the Autobots expected the Seekers to bend to their ways rather than the reverse.
Starscream was finally back to kas usual self, fully willing to make biting remarks or flash kas dentae at any Autobots that came to close, and scrap did Autobots come close.
"Back off!" Starscream hissed as yet another Autobot in the halls drifted just a little too close, hand hovering near kas plating.
Thundercracker pulled Starscream closer, fighting not to growl. That was his trinemate. He didn't recognize the Autobot, so they must have been assigned to the base while he was gone. It explained their brazenness.
The Autobot's brow furrowed. "You're supposed to be nice."
"I am being nice," Starscream said. "I am not clawing your face off for your disrespect."
Ka made a show of kas claws. The Autobot was undeterred. They reached out again and Starscream backed away with a hiss, pressing kaz into Thundercracker. Finally letting out a growl, Thundercracker stepped forward.
"Enough!" he said. "Would you do this to another Autobot?"
"Autobots don't have wings," the Autobot said.
Thundercracker grabbed the knob on the side of the Autobot's helm and yanked. The Autobot let out a disturbed cry and tried to pull away. Baring his dentae, Thundercracker tightened his grip.
"How does this feel?" He said.
"Let me go!" The Autobot said.
Thundercracker shook them. "How does it feel?"
"Bad!" The Autobot said. "Let me go!"
Thundercracker released the Autobot. They scrambled away.
"Think of that next time you touch someone without their permission!" Thundercracker yelled as the Autobot sprinted down the hall.
Thundercracker stayed rooted in place until the Autobot was gone. He turned back toward Starscream and the others with a sigh.
"Don't say it," he told Soundwave.
"They're all like that," Soundwave said.
Thundercracker sighed again. After the Autobots realized the Seekers weren't going to hurt them, it seemed all caution went out the window. Why was it so difficult to respect them?
They entered the mess hall. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker didn't acknowledge him, and looked away when he tried to get their attention. It stung, but he had already resigned himself to never sitting with them again. Any attempts to speak with them were also brushed off. On the other side of the room—surrounded by empty tables as always—were Sunstorm and nas trine. Thundercracker took a seat next to them.
Bitstream and Hotlink smiled at him, raising their wings in greeting. Hotlink handed him a scute of plating from the cyberdeer they brought in. He bit into it, savoring the taste. Cyberdeer were quick and skittish—it was difficult to catch one unless hunting as a trine.
The air surrounding Bitstream was warm with joy. Ka rubbed kas chest, which reminded Thundercracker…
Softly, he elbowed Starscream. Ka sat up straighter. Beside kan, Skywarp did the same.
[{ID:THCR} I'm going into Hunger soon. We're not safe, but we're the closest we've been in a long time, and Megatron is dead. I've been thinking…]
[{ID:SKWP} about what?]
Thundercracker braced himself.
[{ID:THCR} Having seekerlings, if you two are okay with it.]
Starscream's wings flicked. Anxiety wafted through the air, traveling from Skywarp.
[{ID:STSC} I told you I'd raise any seekerlings you carried. I meant it.]
[{ID:SKWP} we can try…]
Thundercracker's spark lightened. They were willing.
[{ID:THCR} I want both of you to sire.]
Starscream stiffened.
[{ID:STSC} No.]
[{ID:THCR} Why not?]
Starscream placed the jar of powder in kas hand on the table in a pointed gesture.
[{ID:STSC} They could end up like me.]
Thundercracker laid a hand on the jar.
[{ID:THCR} What if I want that? 'Like you' isn't a bad thing to be.]
Starscream turned away.
[{ID:STSC} You don't understand.]
[{ID:THCR} I understand that you've been told you were born wrong. That you're unloveable. But I love you, and I want to do this with you. I don't mind having a seekerling with your condition.]
Starscream's wings drooped. Ka snatched the jar off of the table.
[{ID:STSC} I suppose Bitstream's seekerlings will need peers…]
Thundercracker's spark lightened. He smiled.
[{ID:THCR} Thank you. Both of you. You'll be amazing sires. I know it.]
Thundercracker's good mood lasted throughout the meal. Bitstream was positively beaming, excited to be carrying even if it was because Sunstorm couldn't. Sunstorm had warmed up to the idea, keeping Bitstream close and making remarks about how na would help raise the seekerlings.
But eventually, the meal was eaten. Sunstorm and nas trinemates had to return to the flock. Today was supposed to be a free day, but Thundercracker was certain his time would be occupied one way or another. As he and his trinemates made their way back toward their room, he was proven correct.
Arcee stood at the doorway, her arms crossed. As Thundercracker approached, she frowned.
"What is it?" Thundercracker asked.
Had another fight broken out?
"Mind explaining to me why you're assaulting my Autobots?" She said.
Well, first of all, they weren't hers. They were Prowl's. He just left her in charge.
Thundercracker scoffed. "Me? Assaulting them? They were harassing Starscream!"
"You grabbed Freeway by the audial," Arcee said.
That was their audial?
"Freeway was trying to touch Starscream's wings," Thundercracker said, a growl beginning in his engine. "You don't touch a Seeker's wings."
It was one of the most repeated things in the seminar. Yet, it seemed not a single Autobot remembered. Had they actually listened, or did they just pretend to pay attention?
Arcee sighed. "I'll reprimand him later. But you can't go around scaring the recruits. Everyone is wary enough as is."
Seriously? Scrap it. He didn't care about being polite anymore. That Autobot tried to touch his trinemate.
"Didn't seem that wary to me," Thundercracker growled. "Keep your soldiers in line. I'm getting tired of breaking up fights they provoked."
Arcee balked. "That they provoked? My soldiers don't fly off the handle if someone touches them!"
Thundercracker growled. Starscream stepped between them, a snarl on kas face.
"Wings are sacred!" Starscream spat. "Only for family and lovers to touch! You are harassing us! Attempting to touch us even when told not to! Why would we not defend ourselves?"
Arcee stared, her brow furrowed and lips pulled downward. How could Thundercracker make her understand?
"It's like if someone touched your wheels," He said.
Arcee's face shifted into one of disgust before she collected herself.
"I… I see," she said quietly. "I'll have a talk with them."
After an awkward goodbye, she headed down the hall. Thundercracker sighed as he opened the door to the room. The group went inside, settling into their usual positions. There was plenty to do, but for now, they could relax.
Starscream was looking at the datapad again. A different diagram this time, but the same focused face. If not for Sunstorm, would ka have learned medicine? Was that what ka was trying to do now?
Thundercracker needed to find a way to help ka feel useful. Some of kas confidence had returned after the confrontation with Skywarp, but feelings like that didn't just go away. If Sunstorm refused to train kan, then maybe Ratchet would be willing. He didn't have any reservations when it came to working with Sunstorm, and had no concept of trine roles.
But as Thundercracker kept running over the idea in his mind, he hesitated. What if this wasn't what Starscream actually wanted?
"Starscream," Thundercracker said quietly. Kas wings flicked in silent acknowledgement. "If you were given the opportunity to learn medicine, would you take it?"
Starscream looked up from the datapad.
"Yes," ka said. "But that's never going to happen. Sunstorm would have my helm."
Never… well, Thundercracker was going to change that. He stood up. Starscream moved to stand up with him, with Skywarp close behind. He motioned for them to stay.
"I'll be right back," He said. "Private meeting."
His trinemates eyed him warily, but stayed where they were. He shook himself out to relieve tension and opened the door. The trek down the hall was simultaneously too short and too long. He didn't know if Sunstorm would be there, so he would have to hope na wouldn't be.
A flash of yellow through the entrance almost made Thundercracker reconsider, but as he looked closer, he realized it was just an Autobot—the yellow one with shoulder doors whose name he never quite caught. It was something about cybees. Bee, maybe?
Bee waved to him. First Aid looked up from the leg joint she was examining. Her optics searched his frame before she returned to her work.
"He's in the back," she said. "Inventory."
Thundercracker thanked her before heading in exactly that direction. As she said, Ratchet was in the back, a datapad in hand as he counted supplies. Thundercracker waited until he finished counting the supply he was on before speaking, but Ratchet beat him to it.
"What do you want?" He said. "You're not here for a checkup or you'd be out front."
"Yeah," Thundercracker said. His wings twitched, a small rush of anxiety rising in him. "Would you… consider taking on an apprentice?"
Ratchet raised his brow. "I already have First Aid, don't I?"
Thundercracker slumped. "Well, yeah, but…"
He paused. Something in him wanted to search the room even though he knew Sunstorm wasn't there.
"Starscream wants to learn medicine but the flock will never let him," he said. "I was thinking that maybe… you could teach him?"
Ratchet hummed. "Why wouldn't they teach… him?"
The hesitation to refer to Starscream as large was noticeable, Thundercracker was just grateful Ratchet was making an attempt.
"Seekers have different roles," Thundercracker said. "Starscream used to be a role that let him learn medicine, but he transitioned away from it. Sunstorm refuses to teach him because of it."
Ratchet didn't need to know anything beyond that. It was just enough to get the point across without revealing things Starscream may not be comfortable with.
"Well," Ratchet said. "I'm sure I can spare some time."
Thundercracker's spark lightened. "Thank you!"
He rushed back toward the room, pondering how he would tell Starscream the news.