Work Text:
4:45 AM
Yuri: [picture of a raccoon being held like baby. it shows no sign of aggression]
Yuri: kity :)
7:45 AM
Sayori ☀️: YURI HUH
Yuri: ? What did I do?
nat: kity :)
Sayori ☀️: SCROLL UP
Yuri: What
Yuri: I dont remember taking that. Or going to bed that late, for that matter.
Moni x3: You weren't supposed to make your poems literal-
Yuri: That cannot have been me who sent that...
Yuri: I wouldn't cradle a raccoon like a baby, would I?
nat: you would
Sayori ☀️: YOU DID
Moni x3: You would, yeah
Yuri: :( Perhaps I have a case of sleepwalking. Alas.
Yuri: I should get tested for rabies...
5:01 AM
Yuri: [picture of the same raccoon at her window]
Yuri: kitty is back...
Yuri: [raccoon holding again. it is pleased]
Yuri: its ust a baby...
Sayori ☀️: GIRL WHAT
Sayori ☀️: put that thing DOWN
nat: WHY DID YOU LET IT IN???
Yuri: stinky. stinky little bastard kity
nat: how lucid are you
Yuri: lkttle baby kity....
nat: ok thats a pretty solid 0/10
Sayori ☀️: five dollars she doesnt remember this tomorrow
nat: bitch im not betting i know ill lose
Yuri: [raccoon sleeping. happy]
Sayori ☀️: LOL
nat: how did she domesticate a fucking RACCOON.
Yuri: [2 second video of raccoon purring]
nat: THEY PURR????
Sayori ☀️: could be yuri
nat: ??? why would yuri be purring
Sayori ☀️: im like pretty sure shes just a cat in a human suit LMAO
nat: LMAOOOOO okay yeah thats fair
7:25 AM:
Yuri: There is a fucking raccoon in my house. It is, in fact, not “just a baby.”
Moni x3: Has it bit you at all? Scratching?
Yuri: Oddly enough, I don't think so.
Yuri: I am going to the doctors after I get it out of my house. I will be missing club today.
nat: girl i hate to break it to you but you let it in
Yuri: I know.
Yuri: I read up this time :)
10:45 AM:
Yuri: Not rabid. Although the doctor did advise me to stop touching wild animals and see a psychologist. I might miss another meeting on the 8th.
“Yuri” has been changed to “NOT RABID 🎉🎉🎉”
NOT RABID 🎉🎉🎉: Thanks
nat: you or the raccoon?
NOT RABID 🎉🎉🎉: Both? I'd assume. I didn't bring the raccoon with me, so there is a possibility it's just me.
“NOT RABID 🎉🎉🎉” has been changed to “Yuri”
Moni x3: If you’re already done with the appointment, why don’t you come back to school?
Yuri: I was supposed to do not just one, but two presentations today.
Yuri: My ulterior motives are incredibly low, and I am sorry. If my tardiness regarding clubtime is an issue, I could sneak in through the backdoor if you’d like.
Moni x3: Noooo there’s no need for that. Enjoy your rabies-free day!
nat: LMAOOOO YEAH GIRL I GET IT
nat: i would rather bite off my own hand than do this presentation rn
Yuri: Likewise.
4:25 AM:
Yuri: [bird held like hamburger]
Yuri: kity :)
Sayori ☀️: OH MY GOD
Moni x3: I'm about to put her on house arrest.
Yuri: [the bird actually isnt too peeved about it]
Moni x3: Yuri, where are you? Certainly if you can send images you can find the location button.
Yuri: [just pavement]
Yuri sent [location]
Moni x3: Oh wow you actually did it
Moni x3: Stay there, I'm on my way 👍 And put the bird down while you're at it, if you haven't.
-
4:27 AM
Moni x3: Yeah shes sleepwalking and texting somehow. Impromptu sleepover starts now
6:55 AM:
Yuri: I am so sorry.
Moni x3: It's okay, you're not in control of it. Maybe tell your parents?
Yuri: Business trip, gone for the next few weeks.
Moni x3: Ask the doctor more thoroughly about it? Maybe there's some tests they can run...
Yuri: I will try that. I will try to make an appointment.
8:25 AM:
nat: the scariest part of this whole ordeal is that yuri has autocaps off LOL
Yuri: i'm afraid so.
Yuri: I don't know why I have them off, they just are.
10:25 AM
Sayori ☀️: cmon yuri... you wanna join us in lowercase...
Yuri: Not particularly.
nat: you wanna
Yuri: well, how am i supposed to argue with that?
Sayori ☀️: 🫵 WHIPPED
Yuri: ??? Bitch
Sayori ☀️: HSHGKGNJSEKJNKL
Sayori ☀️: yuri fucking swaering at meh....
Yuri: 🫵 MYSPACE TYPING
Sayori ☀️: SHUT UP NOOOO AJFHWEUKHFJK
nat: HAS KEYSMASHED MORE THAN ONCE IN THIS CONVO
nat: 🫵 WHIPPED
Sayori ☀️: NOOOOOOOOO......
Sayori ☀️: @/Moni x3 THEYRE BEING MEAN 2 ME
Moni x3: ...
Moni x3: 🫵 WHIPPED
Sayori ☀️: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Sayori ☀️ sent an image [AUUGUGHGHNHHHHH]
nat: LMAOOOOO WE GOT YURI GIGGLING
Yuri: It was a chuckle. A formidable laugh.
nat: THAT WAS A GIGGLE AND WE BOTH KNOW IT WDAFSKGHJFKJHAS
Yuri: You will be silenced.
Sayori ☀️: its okayyyy yuri im sure your giggle was very handsome and brooding
nat: 🫵 WHIPPED
Sayori ☀️: WHAT THE SCALLOP EVERY1 SO MEAN TO ME 😭
4:25 PM:
Yuri: Called the doctors and set up an appointment. Will be missing club on the 8th and 27th of next month.
Moni x3: You do know you don’t have to give me this much warning in advance right? Like you could tell us day of if you wanted to
Yuri: Oh, was I supposed to keep it a secret?
Yuri: I lied. I will be missing a meeting eventually in the future. When is anybody’s guess. Just whenever I feel like it, really.
Moni x3: LOL okay
nat: so never?
Yuri: No, on the 27th.
Yuri: Oops
nat: LMAOOOO okay noted never ask yuri to keep a secret
Yuri: :(
7:25 AM:
Yuri: Publicly shaming Monika this fine morning. Her solution to my sudden sleepwalking/texting was to grab me “like kity :)”.
Moni x3: ITS THE ONLY WAY
Yuri: There are plenty of ways, and that was certainly one of the more hazardous.
Moni x3: Well did it not work?
Yuri: ... It did work, yes.
Moni x3: Then I hardly see the problem ;)
nat: not every morning i open the gc and see yuri & monika actively talking about cuddling eachother
Moni x3: Important context you are missing, she has not gotten out of my arms. I also asked first for the record she is being dramatic ✨
Yuri: You are warm, your house is not. Simple as that.
nat: LMAOOOOO
> “Sayori ☀️: im like pretty sure shes just a cat in a human suit LMAO”
Sayori ☀️: LMAOOOOOOOOO
Yuri: No comment.
Sayori ☀️: because its the TRUTH
Yuri: I invoke the 2nd.
Yuri: *** I invoke the 5TH. Not the 2nd. Wrong one Sorry
Sayori ☀️: ?????? THREATENIONG ME
Moni x3: Yuri thats mean dont do that
Yuri: Yes ma’am
nat: 🫵 WHIPPED
Sayori ☀️: 🫵 WHIPPED
Moni x3: LOL???? LOCKED AND LOADED
Sayori ☀️: just like yuri apparently
Yuri: I do not own a firearm... T_T
Moni x3: I mean with thsoahfnj
Moni x3: she hitted me
nat: ???? WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU GOING TO SAY
Yuri: Mean to me. All of you, to maximum security for a thousand years.
Sayori ☀️: Tyrannosaurusical....
Moni x3: LOL YOU’RE RIGHT NATSUKI SHE DOES GIGGLE
nat: LMAO
Yuri: It is a chuckle. a Normal formidable chuckle.
nat: cmon yuri we all know youre the giggler
Yuri: FIRING SQUAD
nat: JUDGBHNKSKJHGNHKE ????? NOOOOO
Moni x3: YURI DONT THREATEN TO EXECUTE OUR FRIENDS HGSHGJKE
Yuri: MAximum secuirty. Forever
nat: ohhhhh so I get executed while ythe one you’re CUDDLING WITH RIGHT NOW gets just imprisoned. i see smh
Yuri: Untrue, Sayori also gets maximum security imprisonment forever.
Sayori ☀️: ???? WHAT DID I DO
Yuri: You know what you did.
Moni x3: She has no idea either LOL
Yuri: Mean to me...
Sayori ☀️: yuri you are giving off serious miette vibes right now
Sayori ☀️: which is NOT helping your case HSHKIFGHIHG
Yuri: Who is Miette?
Sayori ☀️: omg wdym who is miette
nat: holy shit she doesnt know miette
Moni x3: Oh you are so right she is just like Miette right now lol
Yuri: Oh, is this like the “glaggler phosphate?”
Sayori ☀️: IUGHJSKLGHJKLE THE WHAT??
Sayori ☀️: NOOO MIETTES JUST A CAT BUT I REALLY WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE GLAGGLER PHOSPATE IS NOW LMAO
Yuri: Honestly, I am not entirely sure myself. Someone keeps coming up to me and talking at me about it.
nat: DO YOU MEAN GAGGLE AND ENPHOSO?????
Yuri: Oh, oops.
Yuri: Yes, Gaggle and Enphoso sounds right. Not Glaggler and Phosphate.
Yuri: To be honest, I don’t really listen when they talk to me.
Sayori ☀️: LMAOOOO YEAH THATS SO REAL
nat: WHO THE HELL IS TALKING TO YOU ABOUT GLAGGLELAND LMAOOOOO
Yuri: Arabori Haru.
Moni x3: She is 100% messing with you
Yuri: I assumed as much.
nat: oooooh ythat makes sense. yeah she is for sure trying to get you say something she can take out of context
nat: ANYWHO gaggle and enphoso is like this meme about smiley faces and like a country/theme park i think
Yuri: Is Enphoso the more saturated yellow one?
nat: yeah with like the smile lines. did she show you a picture
Yuri: Yes. Quite a few, actually.
nat: thats really weird i have no idea what shes getting up to
Yuri: I will be sure to update if necessary, I’m not entirely sure what she’s doing either.
Yuri: Disregarding the smiley faces, you said Miette was a cat, Sayori?
Sayori ☀️: YEAH SHES FROM A TWEET
Sayori ☀️ sent a picture. (miette tweet)
Yuri: I must confess that I see the similarities.
“Yuri” was changed to “MIETTE”
MIETTE: Oh, you CHANGE my name? You ALTER IT with your spectral madness for solely my HUMILIATION? Jail for A Thousand Years for thee, I decree it to be. Life sentence for your CRUELTY!
nat: LMAOOOOO YEAH SAYORI YOU MAY HAVE BEEN ONTO SOMETHING
Sayori ☀️: LMAOOOOOOOOOO
Moni x3: canconfirm is quite catlike
Moni x3: I have been trying to get up for like 30 minutes and she wont let me 😔
MIETTE: What else would maximum security jail for a thousand years have been referring to?
Moni x3: omg thats really cute actually...
7:45 AM:
Moni x3: I’m free :3
11:25 AM:
Sayori ☀️: ok can i ask something monika & yuri
MIETTE: Depends.
“MIETTE” has been changed to “Yuri.”
Yuri: Apologies, forgot it was set to that.
Moni x3: Whats up?
Sayori ☀️: are you guys like. together together? are you dating
Moni x3: oops was it obvious? 🫢
Yuri: There might have been some words shared last night.
Moni x3: Yuri it was a little bit more than words and you know it
Yuri: They don’t need to know that...
nat: omg i fucking KNEW something was up with you two LOL
nat: moni whats her lipstick flavor
Moni x3: Raspberry
Yuri: For the record, it is lip balm.
Moni x3: Its lipstick when I get to it
nat: ??? whgat is that supposed to mean
Moni x3: ;)